Worshipping in the everyday workplace

When we think of work, we often think of the dread of waking up on Monday morning, the commute to the office or worksite, or maybe the familiar desk at home where we make our day’s wages. Work is often seen as the evil necessity of life in which we do what we can to make ends meet. And if we’re lucky and blessed, we may have enough to share with those around us. But is this the way it should be?

Work is usually placed within the secular realm of our spiritualized life. This is the part of our life that we separate from the other part that’s clouded with talk about worship, discipleship and faith. But when you think about it, work takes up about a third to a half of the time allotted to us in a week. It’s a vast amount of time that we are spending in the work place. How then can we truly be a disciple of Christ in our everyday life without bringing the act of discipleship and worship into the work place?

In reading Micah 6:6-8, I have come to reflect upon the meaning of worship. Worship is an act of living the everyday life that comes from within. It’s not about what we bring to the table of offering but about where our heart is. And to sum it up nicely, the demand on our heart is that of doing justice, loving kindness and walking humbly with our God.

And in reflecting about that in the work place, I have come to ask myself three questions.

• Am I acting justly and being a champion of justice as I work throughout the day?


• Am I loving kindness and mercy as Christ has shown me in the interactions I have with others?


• Am I walking humbly in a God-fearing way through the choices I make?

If we allow the act of doing justice, loving kindness and walking humbly with God to be the foundational outpouring of our heart into the thoughts, actions, decisions and motives of everything we do at work, then we are learning to bring worship into the workplace. Work now becomes not a place to earn a living but a place in which your act of worship will be seen and felt by those around you. In essence it is also a place where  discipleship happens.

So the question that I leave with you today is this. Will you allow your work to be an arena and an act of worship in your everyday life?

Living generously

What does being generous mean? According to the dictionary, it is to be liberal in giving and sharing (source: dictionary.com). So the question is, what does it mean to live generously in life?

Often times, for most of us, life is about gathering and making do with what we have. Much of our waking hours is spent working and essentially gathering, making, or working for the resources in life that allow us to survive. There isn't much room to give and share. And even if we give and share, it is with the idea of giving out of our excess.

Is this truly being generous? It is in a sense. But it fails in fulfilling the definition of being liberal. Being liberal implies that a person would not be counting their beans before sharing nor are they only sharing out of excess. Rather, it gives the impression that their giving and sharing is out of sacrifice rather than out of excess.

If this is the case with being generous, the idea of giving sacrificially, how often are we all truly generous? I would say, this is probably a challenge for all of us. When society is all about 'me' and 'what and how does it benefit me', it creates a baseline not of what is good for others or for the greater good, but rather a promotion of selfishness and narcissism.

And this is the issue that I am trying to bring to light, how can we learn to be truly generous in how we live? And how can we pass this key virtue of life down to our kids?

Maybe the first thing we need to do is be a bit more self-aware. Not the kind of self-awareness of knowing yourself more but rather the kind that you learn to be aware of those around you in relation to yourself.

And just learn to give and have a habit of giving to those in need, to those less fortunate, or just as a kind gesture to a stranger. It's the idea of learning to love our neighbors as ourselves. Care for those around you as you would want to be treated and to be cared for and as you would for yourself. Simple rules here.

And in passing it to our kids, remind them that they are not the center of the universe. Model for them generosity and show them when someone has been generous to you. Let them see what it means to love and to share love to those around you with no strings attached. And let them see you being willing to receive love.

Generosity is a lifestyle. It's a part of how a person lives their life. It is in a sense, a part of a person's worldview or system of belief. In essence, it's the idea of sacrificing for those around you, not for a return but for the genuine wish of giving someone else a better day or world.

2016: A year in the wilderness

2016 was a big year for my family. It was a year of change and uncertainty. It was a time when everything seemed to be on the edge.

We started the year off with theWife being unemployed and having been so almost half a year at this point and I was on the verge of handing in my resignation for a pastorate. It was a time of trust and worry. We were going to be completely without an income very soon.

Thankfully, upon the handing in of my resignation, theWife was given an offer for a job. This was the lifeline that we were given and held on to. This was also the time when I had to reorient myself. It was a time of self-reflection and resting from the pastorate and moving myself on to the next phase of ministry and calling. All seemed well, it wasn't a lot but we were taken care of. It was an extension of grace.

As summer rolled around, the company that theWife was working with started to experience financial difficulties due to a downward economy and upper management direction and she was once again faced with the prospect of being unemployed. The notice came right at the end of summer. And once again we were back at the point that we feared most, with completely nothing coming in.

Yet this time was also a joyous time. It was the older one's first day of school. He was now officially a Kindergartener at an Elementary school, rubbing shoulders with the older kids. It was great seeing him learn, play and start experiencing life away from home.

With all that had happened, we ended the last quarter of the year with the both of us unemployed. theWife was interviewing but nothing was holding. And as for myself, the call to plant and start a new congregation was starting slowly but without the financial support of the denomination, although we had the blessings and spiritual support.

It was a hard season. There were many nights in which theWife and I wondered where we were heading and what we were doing and whether what I was doing was the right calling and purpose of life. Through all these, we found comfort and encouragement from friends and families. Our parents did what they could with the little resources they had to help us weather the storm a bit better, since most of our original contingency funds were gone from the first unemployment. We were able to seek advice and direction from those wiser than us. We were supported by a neighborhood of families (read about their support here).

Overall, this was a year with a lot of uncertainty and a lot of questioning. It was a year in which we learned to receive love and support from others. It was a year in which I had a lot of reflection upon those families that are also struggling. It was a year of growth through the discomfort of life (read a bit of it here). It was a time of learning what I was made of, what I was living for, and what I was working toward.

Ultimately, it was a year of faith and hope. Faith that God has a purpose and direction. Hope that God will carry us through and actualize his promises and calling. It was a time in which we learned to pray and depend on Him. Sometimes I wonder where we would have been if we had lost our faith and our hope, or if we never had it in the first place. Where would I have turned during this time of stress and distress?

With the coming of the new year, we had some good news. theWife was given an offer for a job, and I was given an offer for a secular job. This coming year will be different. I will be pursuing my calling and becoming a bivocational minister and church planter. It may no longer be a time of wandering in the wilderness, wondering what is happening. It will be a time of change and building. It will be a time in which we take what we have learned and act upon it.

Some of the lessons learned and actions I wish to do:

• Care more for the families in need. Fight for them, help them and support them during their time of hardship.


• Care for the fathers. Help them learn to cope with their roles as a husband and a father. Help them see the importance they have within the life of their family and that they aren't just their occupation.


• Help people find hope and faith. Help them find an anchor in life that will not be shaken or tossed in the waves of life. Help them find a comfort that will help them through the night.


• Live in trust and faith. Trusting that God has a way and a plan. Faith in continually walking forward even when the light seems dim or contrary to human logic.

So farewell 2016, you have been a harsh year but a necessary year. And on to 2017, may I take what I have experienced and learned and be a blessing to others experiencing likewise.

Christmas hamper, a family in need

A Christmas hamper - a collective collection for a family or individual in need during the Christmas season to help carry them through. As noted in a previous post (see here), my family has been working with little leading up to this holiday season. With the kids getting older but yet still very young, it became a point of figuring out how to help them understand the balancing act of living a simple lifestyle as a choice versus living frugally due to circumstances of life. This will be the second holiday season in which the kids will be experiencing this. And here is where the blessing comes in. We have been blessed to be living in a community that cares and loves each other in a very neighborly fashion, where neighbors care for and are concerned for the wellbeing of other families. In essence, they believe a neighborhood is more than just a place to live but a village of families supporting each other.

This community of families, after finding out that my family will be making this hard choice once again this holiday season, decided to band together and do a Christmas hamper drive for us. They wanted the kids to be able to have gifts under the tree. They wanted us to have enough resources to have a family Christmas dinner. They wanted us to be able to spend time as a couple and have a date night. This is a community of families and neighbors that decided on their own that they wanted to bless us in this season of blessing. They wanted us to be able to experience a normalcy that was lost due to the circumstances of life.

I am very thankful for this community. I am very humbled by this gift and this help. Although we were pushed to making these difficult choices in life, we weren't pushed over the edge. Yet this community didn't want to see us over the edge before they helped, they wanted to be there while it was rough and wanted to walk alongside us to help us get back on our feet. I was humbled. For those of us that have had better days, we may be used to helping others. We too are used to being the ones to help give a hand to those in need. And often times, we don't realize it when we ourselves need help too. I was humbled by this experience and this quote from one of the organizers of the hamper.

"We can never be too proud to accept help. All of us need help at one time or another. Sometimes it is for us to help and sometimes it is for us to receive help. We have to be gracious in accepting help. What comes around will eventually go around. You may need a lift this year, but next year when things are better you will be able to give someone else a lift."

This sums up the holiday and Christmas spirit quite well. We have been blessed and gifted with so much in life and we are responsible to use what we have to bless others. And none of us are so above that we can't use a little help here and there in life.

In entering into the Christmas time, this humbling experience has helped me reflect on life. Reflect on the greater gift that was given to us, the gift of love, blessing and grace that came from God in the form of His Son Jesus. We were in trouble, and although not necessarily looking for or asking for help, He initiated and offered. And we can only accept humbly and graciously this gift given to us and be thankful.

I am thankful for this community in which I live. I am thankful for those who have rallied around my family to support us through this season. And I am ultimately thankful for the hope that God gave us and continually reminds us of in the events, remembrance and celebration of Christmas.

So step back a little. If you have extra, use it to bless someone else. And if you are in need, be willing to receive help. It is there.

 

Entering into the holiday season with little

A few months back, I wrote about a mom detailing her emotional pain of not being able to give to her daughter the things the little one has asked for due to the financial situation the family was experiencing at the moment (Read it HERE.) Little did I know that my family would be in a similar situation come this Christmas season. Over the course of this year, my wife and I have experienced a number of job changes and job loss and with this in mind, we are in a season of financial constraint, with neither of us officially working for a pay cheque.

For sure, there could be worse situations in life. And to be honest, despite the tightness of finance, we are still relatively positive in being able to find something before our finances become critical and run dry. And I am fully aware of families in situations that are worse off than we are. And here is the reflection that I have, we take so much for granted but life is not something we can take for granted.

In being placed in this relatively uncomfortable position (read about my thought of being in a state of discomfort HERE) of constraint during a season characterized by consumerism and entertainment, it is in itself a blessing and a curse. It's a curse in the fact that you feel you are not able to enjoy the holidays as much as people that are less constrained in their lifestyle. But it's a blessing in the fact that you are essentially sidelined from the consumeristic nature of the holiday season and are instead forced to focus on what the holiday is truly about.

Holidays for us now, with the material gifting and shopping taken away, along with some of the paid experiences being priced out of range, has become an intentional time of relationship and quiet reflection. When you are not able to compensate relationships with material, you are challenged to gift the gift of time and presence, a gift in its truest sense: priceless. You are challenged to reflect on what matters in your life, to reflect over the past year's experiences, relationships, and where life is heading in general.

For me, it truly is becoming a time of reflection. This is probably one of the first Christmases that I don't have to work the various Christmas services and events at my local church. The idea of the holidays and the Christmas season takes on a more pure meaning. It has become a time to reflect on the gift that was once given to us 2000 years ago in the form of a babe named Jesus. A gift of love and peace, a gift of salvation and reconciliation, a gift to which no other material gift can compare. And at the same time, in acknowledging this gift from God, I have come to challenge myself in reflecting how I have been a gift to other people.

Some of the questions that I have been asking myself recently:

1. Have I been present for my kids and family? In a fashion where I am willing to sacrifice and gift myself for them?


2. Have I been a gift for my friends, neighbors and acquaintances? How have I been serving them out of love with no expectations of gain or recognition?

We have been gifted so much in life but often times we don't realize how much we have been blessed until we truly are put in a position of little. And my challenge for all of us, including myself, is this:

Even with what little we have, or for some that have plenty, be willing to serve and be a gift to those around you this season in the measure that has been given to us by God.

This is what the Christmas spirit is about, whether we have much or little, we can give the gift of love.

 

Living in a state of discomfort

Everyone wants to live life comfortably. There's a whole industry and marketing on how to make life more comfortable. The idea of comfort, in and of itself, is not necessarily a bad thing, but there's a danger with comfort that's often overlooked.

Comfort gives a picture of stability and calmness. But at the same time, this stability and calmness comes with a price. A price in which uncertainty and change doesn't have a place within the framework of comfort. And here is the Achilles' Heel of comfort, it is the inability to change, move and to grow organically in life. Comfort ends up being a sanctuary built and created by ourselves against the tide of the world around us. It is a place in which we are able to find stability and the knowledge of knowing what we know is enough and that we can rest comfortably in what we know.

So then, why is being comfortable negative? It isn't in and of itself, but if ever need to navigate change in life, and personal growth in and of itself is a process of continual change, it will rock the stability and comfort level in your life.

Most people and families operate on a level of certainty. We generally call them routines of life or patterns of life. However, the flipside to this is generally known as chaos and a breakdown of structure. I'm not advocating that living in a state of chaos and lack of structure is a good thing, that in itself is very counter productive due to the nature of not navigating with any intentionality or purpose or direction.

Rather I am looking at that in between place of life. The balance of being fully comfortable and fully basking in chaos. This is a very unique place. It's a place in which you haven't fully abandoned comfort and stability but you have jumped off the cliff into the storm of chaos. And here is the unique place where growth and change happens.

It is in the state of discomfort and intentionality that we are able to push toward growth and change. This isn't just within us personally but can be extended toward businesses, organizations and even our own family. In order to move forward and change organically, we have to be willing to step out of our comfort zone. We need to be willing to embrace a level of discomfort and chaos in life. We need a bit of the unknown. And it is within this unknown and discomfort that we find who we are, where we are going and who we can depend on.

It is a unique position in life. It is a posture of allowing what you have built to be destroyed and rebuilt. It is a gamble that the outcome will be better than what you had before. But without this, you will only continue being where you were and who you were before. There would be no change, no growth.

Some of this growth will demand us to give up something or let go of something. And it'll be alright. You're learning to move beyond to something greater.

So the thought and challenge I want to leave with you today is this:

Are you so comfortable and stable that you have ceased to grow and improve? And how are you maneuvering your life so that you can keep growing, improving and changing?

 

Dealing with burnout

Burnout is one of those things that people talk about and people seemingly understand but when you dig deeper, no one can seem to explain what it is. If you've been following some of the new studies, there's a close relation between burnout and depression. But either case, burnout is a state in which you feel a lack of enthusiasm, lack of motivation and a drop in productivity. Whether or not this is a true condition is still being debated by the professionals.

Most people focus on the occupational aspect of burnout and it's true that this is where you will find it most often. But I want us to focus on life as a whole, meaning some of us may experience burnout or burnout-like symptoms in other aspects of our life such as being a parent, being a student or just life in general. I think thinking of it holistically is very important because life isn't just about work. Rather, work is a part of life as a whole.

Often times, the path to burnout is not so much about the work that's being done or the situations in life leading up to it but that there isn't enough rest and balance in life. Without the rest that your body, mind and soul desperately needs, you will eventually run yourself to the ground via exhaustion. Some people call this burnout, some call it running yourself into a rut and some just see it as life and that you just need to get over it. This lack of rest is a tell-tale symptom of imbalance in life. Imbalance often starts with the mis-allocation of our life's resources, our energy, or our time toward something, which then becomes overdrive and suffocates our own ability to reassess, rest and balance life.

The cost of imbalance is devastating. The fact that you are continually mis-focusing your energy, time, relationships and resources will impact your life whether you admit it or not. Or more like we are so used to it that we don't know what being healthy and balanced is anymore. It will put strains on your relationships, your family, your job and your work. It will affect your physical and mental health. It will affect your inner soul, your spirit and your spirituality.

This continuation of mis-focus or imbalance will eventually break you. Why do you think mental illness, depression and anxiety is at an all time high? It's because with the nonstop world around us, we haven't had a chance to just step back and take a break anymore, refocus and maintain balance. With the increased demand of our attention and the demand of an instantaneous response, we have forgotten how to wait, be still and just listen to the world around us.

Stepping away from it all is imperative for your health and mine. I have seen the edge of the cliff, I have seen the depth of the cliff, and I have seen it in others. Sometimes, we are so used to performing that we lose sight of what we are working toward. Other times, we have invested so much into something that we can't see anything else. And I'm not just talking about work as in occupation but also about the other aspects of life - being a parent, being a spouse, being a friend, etc. We all work toward something but when it becomes imbalanced, you walk a fine line.

You can't do any of that without taking a step back. You need it. Your family needs it from you. Your work needs it for you to perform optimally. And those around you need it from you to help maintain a healthy relationship.

Stepping back is hard. It's an intentional time. A time to take a mental break. A time to take a physical break. A time for your soul, mind and body to catch up again. What this break looks like will be different for everybody. Some just need a hobby. Some just need sleep. Some just need quiet. It is different and very personal.

But the fact of the matter is, whether you are on the road to burnout or not or whether you believe in burnout or not, you need balance in life. And balance in life is only achievable if we are intentional in what we are doing.

What does living intentionally look like?

1. Learn to say no and yes based on your priorities and abilities.


2. Learn what fuels you and what drains you. Make sure you are balanced.


3. Learn to listen to your soul and your body. Sometimes, it knows us better in terms of what we need to rebalance.


4. And most importantly for me, learn from and lean on your relationship with God and allow that to overflow to the rest of your life. With God as the source and center of your life, you can trust that you will never be depleted nor imbalanced.

An article of interest pertaining to using and finding intentional rest and space in life is HERE.

Taking time out

Taking some time out and away from it all. Don't we all dream about this? I'm not talking about just a vacation or a trip. I'm talking about taking some time out and walking away from life.

Why walk away from life? Life is always moving and going. Life doesn't ever take a break. So the question and often the guilt is 'Can I afford to just walk away?'

And my answer for you is yes, you absolutely need to take a step away from life every so often and you can't afford not to. You can't afford to keep going. You can't afford to keep up with the race and pace of life. You must stop, drop and walk.

So why am I such a strong advocate for this? Because when we keep going and running, we often lose sight of what we are doing and why we are doing it. Or for some, we become so absorbed in what we are doing that we haven't taken the time to see what we have done. We need to step back and reassess. Reassess what we are doing. Reassess where we are going. Reassess if it is worth it. Reassess how and what we need to change to realign ourselves.

 

So what have I gotten from taking these 'steps back' and 'time outs' in life? I have gained clarity. I have gained a healthier psyche and spirituality in life. I have gained more energy to pursue what I feel called to do. I have been able to improve the relationships around me.

Without the step back, you wouldn't know what is wrong. Without the step back, you wouldn't know what it is that is great and central in your life.

So my challenge for you is this, take an intentional step back and intentionally schedule it in your life. How do I do this?

1. Schedule in your time away. Set aside the time on your calendar. Doesn't have to be long, but enough for you to focus and refocus.


2. Inform those closest around you why you are doing this and what it is for.


3. Use that time to contemplate and reflect. Use it to meditate and pray.


4. Write/Draw. Have a log/journal and write or doodle out your thoughts. It isn't so much for you to read but for you to just release your brain and its burdens.


5. Lastly, take what you have learned about yourself and the renewed energy you gained and put them toward the things that matter in life, your family, yourself and your calling.

This is what some call taking a Sabbath or a Sabbatical. You need it.

Core Words: Duty

This is the last of the series on Core Words, knowing and understanding yourself in order to define what is important in your life and reframing your life around those things. The last topic to cover is the last pillar or conduit. For me it's the word "Duty."

There's a foundation from which everything in life stems and a goal towards which you aim in everything you do. Family is a place where you learn and grow in these two aspects. The other parallel is duty. Duty is a big word with different meanings for different people. And if you were to throw a stone at any one person on the street and ask them to define duty, they will probably have a different answer for you.

Duty for me is two fold. It's what you do in life, as in your profession, your calling, or whatever else you busy your time with during your waking hours. And it's the obligations of life. Here we will explore both and how they are interrelated.

First off is your profession and/or calling or just what you do. This is your job and work, either what you get paid to do or what you have decided to do because you have a passion for it. This is probably the next heaviest use of your time in life, aside from family. This is probably the place where you spend most of your energy and waking hours. This is the place where if you were intentional in what you're doing, you can make an impact on the lives of those around you, those you work with or those you serve in your work. Work is often viewed as just a way to pay the bill, and this isn't wrong, but work can be so much more if you take it intentionally as a place where you can make an impact on the world around us.

Think about it. Whether you are the cashier at a big box store or the executive of a multi-million dollar enterprise, you will interact with people. Your attitude at your position and how you interact with those around you will say much about what is grounding your life and what you are aiming for. For the cashier that is more likely than not making minimum wage and probably not fully making ends meet in life, this job can be a get-it-done-to-get-the-cash-and-move-on or it can be a platform in making the lives of those that spend those couple minutes with you at the checkout a nightmare or a paradise in shopping. When you are aiming for excellence, your attitude and your ethics will reflect it. The people that come to you will see a difference that you ain't working just for the cash but rather you are also working to make this essential part of life better. And if you are the executive? Yeah, you have power, prestige and worth, in the world's eyes, but how do your clients and workers view you? Do they view you as the monster of a boss that they need to gravel and kiss up to? Or are you an executive that is known to care and take care of the staff, one that wants to help build up those around you and move them on to a better place in the world? It makes a difference.

Our work place is often like a second home for most of us. Our coworkers can either be competition in a cut-throat world in the advancement of yourself. Or they can be the family away from home that is working mutually together to make the world a more humane and liveable place. A place where you can make a difference and an impact, no matter how small or isolated, is still an impact.

Moving on to duty as obligation, this is the part where duty isn't so much about what you do, but what you have committed yourself to. Yes, your work and your volunteering is a form of obligation but what I want us to delve deeper in is this idea of a deeper obligation in life. The type of obligation that you make within your heart and your mind. The type of obligation that you are willing to stake down and take a stance for.

These obligations take many forms. For some, it is the obligation that they will be there for their family no matter what. For some, it is the deep belief that is driven by their foundations of life to live a certain way or to make an intentional decision on how life is to be done. It's a heart issue. Where are you going to place your life on? What are you fighting for in life? Are you fighting for something that is worthwhile?

In pulling back and understanding the two aspects of duty, you may see why I have chosen this as one of my Core Words. Duty in what you do, how you do it and why you do it. It's the place where you live out what drives you, and the place where you practice and work toward the goal of life.

I'm not sure about you. But as we close this series on Core Words, I hope that you have been challenged to reflect upon life, on what your foundation is, your goals, and how you're going to get there. For me, my foundation is built upon faith in something greater and bigger that creates purpose and I am working toward integrity in all I do, via the means of family, the place where I have learned both and where I can practice both, and of duty, making an impact on the world in which I live.

I hope this has been an eye opener. I hope that you too would reflect and select your Core Words in life.

I would love to hear back on your thoughts, comments and what you have selected as your Core Words.

(This is part 5 of 5 pertaining to the ideal of Core Words.)

Part 1: Defining and Knowing Yourself

Part 2: What is Integrity

Part 3: Baseline of Faith

Part 4: Family

Part 5: Duty

Core Words: Family

Core Words are words that I live by. These are words that form my basic operating principles of life. We have looked at integrity as the destination and goal for everything I do. We have looked at how faith undergirds everything as the foundation and the reason for everything I do and every decision I make. So now we move on to what I call the conduits. The idea of how I move from living with faith towards having integrity in everything I do. These two conduits are family and duty. Here I want to tackle family.

Family are those that are closest to us. The ones that know us the best. The ones that see what the public doesn't see. The ones that know what the public doesn't know. Family are generally the ones we are most comfortable with. The ones we generally fall back on when the going gets tough. They are our safety.

However, for some families, the opposite of what I had just described is true. It's a place of strangers. It's a place where trust cannot be held, cause it has been broken one too many times. It's a place of danger due to the abusive environment it had been in in the past or is currently still in. It's a place of chaos, as no one seems to be in charge or knows what is happening nor when the next meal may be.

I'm not sure where you stand on this. But for me, family has been the closest thing to me. Family has been the ones that built me into who I am today. They're the ones that supported me in my dreams and callings in life, whether it made sense or not. They're the ones that believed in me.

But the thing is, family doesn't just include those that are biologically related to me. I have found that family extends further. It extends to those that have come into the inner circle of my life. The ones that have been there and seen me at the worst and at the best. The ones that have been there to correct me and to support me. The ones that have been like a father or mother away from home or the brother or sister that I don't have. The ones that have been a part of my life and have intertwined theirs with mine.

Where am I getting with all this? I'm laying the groundwork for why family is important to me and why it may be for you too. Why as I move on in life, I want to be there for my family, those that have been closest to me, those that have been there for me, those that have invested in me. These are my immediate family, my relatives, my friends and my church. They're all my family.

In order for you to be able to be there for your family, you need to let them be there for you. You need to be willing to be transparent with them. You need to be willing to allow them to correct and speak to you. And at the same time, you need to make a commitment to speak truth and love to them too, for their betterment and growth.

So that sums up why family is a conduit of my life and one of my Core Words. It is through family that I learn to live out my faith with integrity. They're the ones that sharpen me in life. They're the ones that grind away the garbage and the excess in my life. And I also want to do the same for them.

Family is the unspoken bounds of life. It's what keeps me going. It spurs me to keep going deeper in my pursuit of living with faith toward a life of integrity.

What about you? Have you found family to be one of your conduits in life?

Maybe your experience hasn't exactly been the same as mine but I'm certain there is someone that is family to you without you realising it till now.

(This is part 5 of 5 pertaining to the ideal of Core Words.)

Part 1: Defining and Knowing Yourself

Part 2: What is Integrity

Part 3: Baseline of Faith

Part 4: Family

Part 5: Duty

Core Words: Baseline of Faith

A while back I blogged about why faith was an important aspect of my life by asking the question 'Why bother?' (Catch up here) This post isn't about why faith, but about how faith forms a premise for my life. If integrity was the aim and formational ideal of life, then faith is the foundation and premise upon which life is built.

Everyone wants to be their own man or woman. We all want to be in control and be the boss of our lives. But the question is, "Are we actually in control and are we actually the boss of our own life? Or is there something else?" This is a deep introspective and reflective question. A question that goes to the core of our being. And the answer will drive a lot of who we are, what we are, and what we do.

Whether we accept it or not, we are bound to something. We are driven by something. We have a baseline set to something. We call this the framework or worldview of our being. We call this a guide to our decision-making process. We call this the drive for which we live.

Some of us are driven by a larger paycheque. Some of us are driven by the people around us, our family, our kids, our friends. We are driven to show them we have succeeded or that we are worthwhile. Some of us are driven by the accolade of success and the fame that society or a subset of society will heap on us. Some of us are driven by the quietness of our soul and we may seek to be one with nature and away from others. Everyone is driven and is working for something personal to them. This something in a sense, forms the basis and baseline of their life. Some are more noble than others and some are more selfish than others. But regardless, we are driven by something.

So the question is, "What is forming your baseline?"

For me, my baseline is faith. Faith is what drives me. I'm not talking about a vague faith or spirituality of living. I'm talking about a faith in which I have experienced change and transformation in life. A faith that I would argue is alive and living. A faith that isn't about me or myself or my will but a faith that is larger and bigger. A faith in a creator. A being that is larger, more powerful and incomprehensible by our finite human minds. A being that has set up the premise of what it means to live a good life, be a good father, be a good husband, be a part of a community and the world in which we live. A faith in which we are driven not by fear of failure or a lack of acceptance but by a reaction to a love given, a grace bestowed when not deserved. Faith is a relationship with this creator, saviour.

Faith is a radical thing to pick as a baseline for life. One of those things in life where it's less about pursuing and more about being. IA baseline that we allow to change and mold our life, to drive us and to form the premise of our operation. A baseline also changes our perspective from ultimately vying for control to handing over the wheel of life to someone else. It is in this allowance that what we build on is not something we built ourselves but something greater, something bigger.

Your baseline forms and molds you. It's the foundation upon which your life is built. The one thing that you can still hold on to when everything in life crumbles and falls apart.

So the question is, "What is your baseline? What is your foundation?" Can this foundation and baseline withstand the shocks, twists and storms of life?

My baseline has and still continues to hold and carry me through even when all else has failed. Has yours?

(This is part 5 of 5 pertaining to the ideal of Core Words.)

Part 1: Defining and Knowing Yourself

Part 2: What is Integrity

Part 3: Baseline of Faith

Part 4: Family

Part 5: Duty

Core Words: What is Integrity

Integrity. That word holds a pretty heavy punch. It's a loaded word. It's a word that most people would want as a word that describes them.

It was in 2001 when I learned this word and what it actually means. Not that I have never heard of or known of the word before, but in 2001 was when I finally got it. Finally got it through a mentor, a friend, a boss. For him, integrity is who you are and what you are when no one is looking or keeping you accountable. Integrity is your character. Integrity is who you really are and what you really are.

This definition of integrity stuck. It struck a chord with me in life. Does it really matter who you are and how you act when no one is there and no one cares? I'm not even invoking the idea of a higher power or God. Just on a very human level, does it matter? It's like asking the age-old riddle, "When a tree is cut in the middle of the forest and no one is there, does it still make a sound?" or "When there is a four way stop in the middle of the desert and you can see mile after miles of barrenness, do you still stop?"

This is integrity. When it still matters even though no one is there or holding you accountable. You are holding yourself to a higher calling and a higher road. This is integrity. You set your standard of living and you live by it. You set your mind on what to do and you do it. Your word is your action.

Integrity is one of my Core Words in life. It is in a sense the pinnacle of what I aim for.

Am I a paragon of Integrity? No, I'm a work in progress. I'm a constant change and challenge to become who I have envisioned myself to be. It's the act, the thought, and the heart of continually holding yourself higher that is important.

Is this all? No, this is but one of four parts that form the Core Words I live by. This is the pinnacle, the aim. But there is still the foundation and the two pillars that I will talk about in the coming posts.

How does this living with Integrity as a Core Word look like:

1. You do what you say, and you say what you do. (eg. If you make a promise with your wife, you keep that promise even if it hurts.)


2. You aim high in how you expect yourself to be. (eg. You submit yourself to a discipline of achieving and moving forward, not allowing yourself to have excuses in life.)


3. You allow yourself to be known by this virtue. (eg. Live a life in which people know you mean it, you're not a fake and you ain't hiding, you admit your wrongs and you fix them.)

So the question I want to leave you with is this, "Will you take up the ideal of Integrity and make it one of your Core Words in life?"

(This is part 5 of 5 pertaining to the ideal of Core Words.)

Part 1: Defining and Knowing Yourself

Part 2: What is Integrity

Part 3: Baseline of Faith

Part 4: Family

Part 5: Duty

Core Words: Defining and knowing yourself

Core Words. Core words are words that describe you, words that reflect who you are and who you want to be. They're words that resonate with your life. They're words that you build your life around. They're words that are you.

It is interesting to see through history - we find families, countries, organizations and companies that all had key words or mottos. These are their core words. In the Game of Thrones, House Stark is known for the words, "Winter is coming". These words embodied who they were, the guardians of the North. They are the shield against the evil of winter. The church in which I am the pastor at, Community Table, we have the words, "Faith, Community, Service." And when I was working at a recreation department at a Big 12 university, their motto was "Where Character Meets Competition."

These core words embody who the family is. These core words speak of the organization or entity that they represent.

So the question is, "Do you have core words for your life?"

I have four core words in my life: Integrity, Duty, Family, Faith.

These four words make up my world. Everything I do, every decision I make, is framed by these four lenses. This helps to simplify life a lot. When life is framed by the core words of your life, you start weeding out the unnecessary parts of life or the parts of life that don't add value to you and those around you.

This is the first in a 5-part series focusing on core words and how they impact and provide a field of operation for me. I invite you to be a part of that journey in seeing how having core words can help you simplify life and start focusing on those things that matter most to you. For me, I know it has.

So I leave you with this challenge:

What are your core words?

(This is part 5 of 5 pertaining to the ideal of Core Words.)

Part 1: Defining and Knowing Yourself

Part 2: What is Integrity

Part 3: Baseline of Faith

Part 4: Family

Part 5: Duty